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Archive for May, 2008

Homies like riding bikes made for shorties. You ever see big old homies riding little bikes? Yeah, dat be us!

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Drive By’s

Homies like drive by’s yo! Drive by’s! Biggie. Tupac. Fo’ sho! Das’ Right!

Dat be hiz auttopsie pix or chitlins? I can’t tell!

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It’s no secret that White people love crack. How come you think they call em Crackers? However, after discovering some photographic evidence of a white dude reducing himself to prostitution in exchange for crack, Homies are now forced to admit that we like us some tight white bums–of the homosexual persuasion. Witness below a brotha pointing out his love for the tight white ass:

At first I thought this was a lady crackhead ain’t nobody gonna be sayin that Homies are GAY! After all, gays are usually white queens, prancing around in their Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses with fake tans and waxed eyebrows. You ever see a black gay dude prancing around? Besides Michael Jackson?

Unfortunately, I zoomed in on the picture and saw the enormous, saggy white sack hanging between the white crackhead’s legs. Wrinkly old balls.

Anyway, though it is yet another travesty for the black community to witness gay sex involving a black individual, we got to consider a few things:

1. Just cuz you let a dude suck your dick it doesn’t make YOU gay.

2. We are challenging the stereotype of the “black crackhead,” and have successfully delivered a blow to the white community, as the Homie was not the one soliciting CRACK!

3. When in need of drugs, the white man will reduce himself to getting fucked in the ass! Say what you will about selling food stamps for heroin–they’re no better than us after all, and they take it in the butt!

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4-Klozures

Yo yo yo in da house!

Homies like gettin’ foreclosed on! ‘Das right!

Everyone deserve the American Dream. Me too. ‘Das right! I buy this house and get tax credits, but I is gonna get 4-klozed on because I don’t pay my bills on time!

I also don’t understand simple math as you can see from this article.

I said, and I quote, “I realize I’m not the only one, but I didn’t realize how many people are being confronted … with this kind of situation,” said LuJuanda Dixon, who is working with counseling group HomeFree-USA to try to save the house in Bowie that she bought with her husband last year for $650,000. Before Danny Dixon lost his job in November, they were making $100,000 a year.”

I be making just 15.3% annually of my home price, and I be ignoring statistics that say you need to be making 33% annually of your home price. I just don’t get it. Where be my section 8 vouchers? I gots to rent an apartment. Salary times three is what I can git. If da salary don’t git, you must acquit!

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Um, does it even need to be said? Homies be lovin Grape Drink!

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Start Off E-Z!

I’ll go first!

Watermelon and Fried Chicken!

 

 

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